Counseling & Support
Fertility treatment is an emotional journey that requires making deeply personal decisions, often bringing both profound insights and unexpected challenges. Couples may find that their coping styles differ, sometimes creating tension, while the physical and emotional demands—often felt more acutely by the woman—can add further strain to the relationship. It’s natural to experience a range of emotions, including anxiety, frustration, grief, and even depression, with hormonal changes intensifying these feelings.
Recognizing the emotional complexities of fertility care, leading programs like RSC incorporate psychological support into their treatment plans, ensuring patients have access to specialized therapists who can provide guidance and coping strategies throughout the process.
Counseling & Emotional Support in Fertility Treatment
Fertility treatment can be emotionally demanding, and good clinics integrate psychological support into their care. Many provide resources such as support group information, educational materials, and access to specialized fertility counselors. Some even offer on-site counseling or referrals to therapists who understand the unique challenges of infertility.
Research suggests that professional counseling can help ease emotional stress and may even improve the chances of conception. While the exact link isn’t fully understood, couples who participate in support groups are often more likely to continue treatment and explore new options. Since many people end fertility treatment due to emotional exhaustion rather than financial constraints, counseling can provide valuable guidance—whether to help couples move forward with treatment or recognize when it’s time to step away.
When to Consider Counseling
Counseling isn’t just for crisis moments—it can provide coping strategies and emotional resilience throughout the fertility journey. It is particularly beneficial during critical decision points, such as before starting IVF, when many patients feel emotionally drained.
Depression is common during fertility struggles, and while women report symptoms more frequently, it can affect either partner. Some individuals may not recognize their own depression, making support from a partner crucial. If you or your partner experience persistent sadness, anxiety, isolation, or other signs of distress, seeking counseling can help. Your doctor can recommend professional support, and in some cases, safe and effective medications may be an option.
Signs You May Benefit from Counseling
Consider seeking support if you notice:
- Difficulty functioning in daily life or relationships
- Persistent sadness, anxiety, or excessive worry
- Social withdrawal or loss of interest in hobbies
- Trouble concentrating, making decisions, or completing tasks
- Changes in appetite, weight, or sleep patterns
- Feelings of bitterness, anger, guilt, or worthlessness
- Thoughts of death or suicide
Emotional well-being is just as important as physical health during fertility treatment. Seeking counseling can provide clarity, support, and the strength to navigate this challenging journey.
In-house Third Party Counseling
Macy Schoenthaler, MFT
Macy Schoenthaler, MFT (Marriage and Family Therapist) works collaboratively with patients and integrates cognitive-behavioral, strengths-based empowerment and positive psychology approaches in therapy. She specializes in third-party fertility and LGBT family building, including the use of an egg donor or surrogacy. Schoenthaler’s own personal struggle with infertility has had a deep impact on her work. With the assistance of in vitro fertilization (IVF) and a sperm donor, she and her wife now have two beautiful twin boys.
Counseling Resources
Organic Conceptions
RSC is helping patients with a free emotional health program that sets it apart from other fertility clinics. The comprehensive program is provided by the Organic Conceptions (OC) organization, founded by a couple who had infertility and struggled to find the mental health assistance they needed.
OC aims to improve patients’ quality of life and reproductive experience. They offer an important lifeline to people that focuses on enhancing emotional well-being and reducing stress by utilizing researched-backed insights, smart nutrition and lifestyle recommendations, as well as an effective mindfulness program.
The program developed is based on nine psychological stages of the fertility journey including anger, grief and envy. It gives patients the tools to process what they are going through instead of suppressing their emotions.
RSC patients receive free Organic Conceptions benefits, including:
- Lifetime membership to Organic Conceptions (a $250 value).
- Access to courses, an online community of support and live group coaching.
- An emotional health and quality of life assessment is provided for men and women.
- A quality of life and emotional health professional assessment.
- Confidential, individualized analysis and guidance recommendations for every aspect of a patient’s infertility journey.
Local and National Resources
RESOLVE is a national support organization for couples with infertility. Resolve has an active presence in the Bay Area. View their ongoing local support groups at resolve.org.
Several counselors in the Bay Area also host local support groups where those managing infertility can come together. Please contact one of the following counselors if you are interested in learning more about a particular meeting.
- Maria Rivas-Wolf, MFT, (650) 208-9815, hosts a support group in San Mateo on the fourth Thursday of every month.
- Qin Fan, PsyD, (415) 595-8577, hosts a support group in San Francisco
- Theresa Fleury, PhD, (510) 334-1663, hosts a support group in Oakland
Infertility & Wellness Coaching
In addition to in-house counseling, some patients may find infertility and wellness coaching helpful. We offer this service through a referral to Heather R. Huhman.
For over five years, Heather endured seven in vitro fertilization transfers (three fresh, four frozen), four miscarriages, and stillborn twins before finally giving birth to her daughter Aurora prematurely in January 2016.
She’s also a Ketogenic & Intermittent Fasting Lifestyle Coach and working toward her Precision Nutrition Level 1 Certification. Her coaching methodology supports the whole person throughout the entire infertility journey.
Email: heather@heatherhuhman.com
